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I think I’m going insane. I feel insane. If this is how the mad hatter feels, why does he like being mad? I’m going insane genuinely and it’s scaring me. I hate how I’m starting to hate living, and I hate how I’m mad. Nothings making any sense right now. God so help me please. I feel as if I’m in a whole other world right now, and I’m not living in reality. I don’t wanna be the mad hatter. I’m not crazy. I think Im just spewing words onto here, because something’s wrong. It’s making me sweat at the palms. Im not sick, at least the sickness where you cough and puke. My heart is racing and my eyes feel wide, as if im scared. This is probably a sign to not smoke tonight.
When my heart stops beating, and the maggots feast on my corpse. Only then I will feel unbound and understood. Once the maggots consume me, I hope they taste the loneliness I’ve endured my whole entire life. For then, I will finally be understood by someone.
But the maggots would be to late, for it has taken that feeling from my lifeless body.
And now they have to suffer with that grey lonesome feeling. The feeling of misery.
But the maggots would be to late, for it has taken that feeling from my lifeless body.
And now they have to suffer with that grey lonesome feeling. The feeling of misery.
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“I can’t stand the way im looking at me”
I wanna tear my skin. I wanna mold myself. I’m slowly giving into the mad man. This body I’m in is a curse, and I want to get rid of every once. I feel absurd, mad even. I wanna pick at my skin until you see my porcelain skull. I wanna be the moon, bright and beautiful. Maybe then I’ll be a muse to peoples eyes.
Im tired of living in this body that I own.
I wanna tear my skin. I wanna mold myself. I’m slowly giving into the mad man. This body I’m in is a curse, and I want to get rid of every once. I feel absurd, mad even. I wanna pick at my skin until you see my porcelain skull. I wanna be the moon, bright and beautiful. Maybe then I’ll be a muse to peoples eyes.
Im tired of living in this body that I own.
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